musical releases that may or may not involve me in some way

5. (i've been trying to make my own) cheese (2:18)
from "jake server's cheese" by jake server
released 8-20-2022
youtube

i got a new hobby today
i've been trying to make my own cheese
it's not going too well
i am failing to make my own cheese
feel like i've tried everything

and i don't even know what cheese i'm trying to make
i just figured i would make some cheese and be done
i've contracted several bacterial infections
i even got one no one else has gotten before
(and still haven't got a cheese yet)

i got a new hobby last month
i've been trying to make my own cheese
it's not going much better
i'm still failing to make my own cheese
still feel like i've tried everything

did research online now i'm a mod on a bustling subreddit
and my girlfriend of three years has decided to go
but i'm finally close to finishing a solid product
after all this time... i just might have my own cheese

(yes, yes! this is cheese! i've finally created it! i've made...)
(EEEEVIL CHEEEESE!)
[various cries of despair]

written, performed, and produced by ben (under the name "joe wormword" (i think?))

6. fast rats facts (2:17)
from "ratless province" by husk recordings
released 3-4-2022
bandcamp

rats have twelve boobs
rats have twelve boobs
rats have twelve boobs
rats have twelve boobs

this one has ten
where's the last pair
no idea
(huh.)

rats have twelve boobs
rats have twelve boobs
rats have twelve boobs
rats wuh eh buh. uh!

rats are sacred in hindu faith
rats also appear on the zodiac

rats have twelve boobs
rats have twelve boobs

rats only live for about 2, 3 years
rats come in varied pigments of fur
rats are an interesting animal
but the utmost inter-esting fact by far

is that rats have twelve boobs
rats have twelve boobs

(and now: for some fake fast rats facts. begin!)

rats don't sleep laying down. instead, they sleep levitating 2 inches off the ground.
rats can comprehend every spoken language except for french.
rats, when inflated, can reach 3 feet in diameter.
rats tend to agree that dead or alive is the best band of all time.
rats cannot see the color lilac.
rats have a better understanding of the subtle meaning of paintings than people do.
rats are secretly elton john in disguise.
rats have thirteen boobs.

(WHAAAT?! THEY DO NOT! YOU LISTEN HERE YOU SNOT NOSED LIAR! RATS HAVE TWELVE BOOBS! THAT'S HOW IT'S BEEN, AND THAT'S HOW IT ALWAYS WILL BE! THERE'S NO REASON IT HAS TO CHA-)
(my goodness, i don't believe it! you mean to tell me that thirteen boobs is the count of boobs on a rat, when i can look at a picture and see twelve, exactly twelve boobs? that is completely ridiculous, and i d-)
accredited to johann slimes

3. we wish you a merry christmas (3:05)
from "a very jake server christmas" by jake server
released 12-23-2021
bandcamp youtube

i did not write this song

produced and performed by ben (credited as "gyakuten")

18. xander's innermost thoughts (0:54)
from "...and his sweet pipes" by xander
released 4-17-2021
bandcamp youtube

hi, they call me xander
i eat my curds and whey
i watch the clouds roll by
each and every day

i am xander the disgraced
i have lost the trust of all
i sit here lonely
waiting to get a call

hi, they call me xander
i eat my curds and whey
i watch the clouds roll by
each and every day

i am xander the disgraced
i have lost the trust of all
i sit here lonely
waiting to get a call

they call me xander
they call me xander
they call me xander -e xander -e xander -e xan- (waiting to get a call)
they call me xander
they call me xander
xander xander xander xander xander xander (waiting to get a call)

original vocals by xander, beat and sampling by ben (under the name "DJ Easy A")

direct all inquiries to lbhf4u@gmail.com.